We have been waiting forever for Eric to finally feel a good baby kick. I've been feeling those little bubbles of pop rocks for the past 9 weeks or so, but only from the inside. I was starting to feel like I was imagining things or I just had some severe digestion problems!
Last night, I went to bed before Eric, which is a very normal occurrence lately. I must have been taking over the whole bed, which is also pretty standard with this growing belly. Eric moved me over and placed his hand on my tummy to say good-night to the baby and just then she/he kicked! Not just a little subtle kick, a "I was asleep and you woke me up" kick.
"Whoa! Did he just kick?"
Me. half asleep, "Yeah, she kicked. Did you feel it?"
"Yeah, that was a big one."
"Well yeah. You pissed off her mom by waking her up."
"Good."
It's nice to know that even during our pregnancy, our relationship has not changed. We are just amazed by little and different things everyday.
Sunday, January 26, 2014
Wednesday, January 1, 2014
The Scary Parts of Pregnancy
I am feeling a bit tired of hearing everyone talk about the joys of pregnancy. About how I am carrying this precious gift and what a blessing it is. I agree with all of this, but no one tells you about all of the things that can go wrong with your pregnancy too.
I have now been pricked with a needle on four separate occasions in the last 21 weeks. The last time I "gave blood" was the day before Thanksgiving. It was for a test that I didn't even know what it was for, but following the advice of Dr. S., I went to the lab to get another poke in the right arm. A few days later, Dr. S.'s office called and told me that my results from the test (that I didn't know what it was for) came back slightly high. "OK...so what does this mean?" I asked. "Well, it just means that your results from your blood work are higher than normal." "Yes, that part I understand," I told the lady as I am flying down the expressway. I asked what this test was for and she said it was to determine if the baby's spinal cord was open or closed. She also said that a genetic counselor would be contacting us about our baby having Spina Bifida. I hung up the phone completely confused. Did we want an open or closed spinal cord? What is Spina Bifida? I thought only drug users or patients with eating disorders had babies with Spina Bifida. I immediately called Eric and burst into tears. "Something is wrong with the baby. What do you know about Spina Bifida?"
After Googling "spina bifida", we found out that poor nutrition and genetic mutations can be the cause of Spina Bifida- neither of which I had. Yet, for two weeks the only thing I could think about was having a child that had physical and mental disabilities. How were we going to get a wheelchair up the stairs? How did parents of children with Spina Bifida do it? Could we be that strong?
The genetic counselor never contacted us, but we had to reach out to her at our ultrasound office. "She is only in on Fridays and her last appointment is at 2:00." Of course it is. So instead of finishing the Polar Express movie with my 24 kindergartners on the last day before Christmas break, Eric and I braced ourselves for heartache and defeat of being terrible parents already. Our 20 week ultrasound was included in this visit, something we should have been looking forward to, but our minds were definitely somewhere else.
We met with the genetic counselor first, who explained that our results for Spina Bifida were only slightly higher than normal and that this test usually appears as a false negative (promising), but we couldn't be sure until the ultrasound. She then went through our family and genetic history, which all seemed very normal. The next 20 minutes were an infomercial of trying to put fear into us and sell us on tests we neither wanted or needed. We were done with testing. If anything were to happen or not happen it would be in God's hands and there was nothing we could do or change.
During our ultrasound, we learned that our baby did not, in fact, have Spina Bifida or any other mutation of the spine. Relived, elated and blessed were the feelings we were experiencing during the next 90 minutes of watching our baby roll, swim and perform a Bela Karolyi type of gymnastics.
We have decided that it's not the fear of the unknown, it's the fear of something going wrong that is the scariest part of pregnancy. This is our first child and we don't know what to expect. No book, doctor or advice can prepare us for what will happen during pregnancy. We know that we will continue to feel all the emotions of pregnancy, even the scary ones, until our little one is here. We just want to enjoy it with a little less fear and a lot more of ignorant bliss.
I have now been pricked with a needle on four separate occasions in the last 21 weeks. The last time I "gave blood" was the day before Thanksgiving. It was for a test that I didn't even know what it was for, but following the advice of Dr. S., I went to the lab to get another poke in the right arm. A few days later, Dr. S.'s office called and told me that my results from the test (that I didn't know what it was for) came back slightly high. "OK...so what does this mean?" I asked. "Well, it just means that your results from your blood work are higher than normal." "Yes, that part I understand," I told the lady as I am flying down the expressway. I asked what this test was for and she said it was to determine if the baby's spinal cord was open or closed. She also said that a genetic counselor would be contacting us about our baby having Spina Bifida. I hung up the phone completely confused. Did we want an open or closed spinal cord? What is Spina Bifida? I thought only drug users or patients with eating disorders had babies with Spina Bifida. I immediately called Eric and burst into tears. "Something is wrong with the baby. What do you know about Spina Bifida?"
After Googling "spina bifida", we found out that poor nutrition and genetic mutations can be the cause of Spina Bifida- neither of which I had. Yet, for two weeks the only thing I could think about was having a child that had physical and mental disabilities. How were we going to get a wheelchair up the stairs? How did parents of children with Spina Bifida do it? Could we be that strong?
The genetic counselor never contacted us, but we had to reach out to her at our ultrasound office. "She is only in on Fridays and her last appointment is at 2:00." Of course it is. So instead of finishing the Polar Express movie with my 24 kindergartners on the last day before Christmas break, Eric and I braced ourselves for heartache and defeat of being terrible parents already. Our 20 week ultrasound was included in this visit, something we should have been looking forward to, but our minds were definitely somewhere else.
We met with the genetic counselor first, who explained that our results for Spina Bifida were only slightly higher than normal and that this test usually appears as a false negative (promising), but we couldn't be sure until the ultrasound. She then went through our family and genetic history, which all seemed very normal. The next 20 minutes were an infomercial of trying to put fear into us and sell us on tests we neither wanted or needed. We were done with testing. If anything were to happen or not happen it would be in God's hands and there was nothing we could do or change.
During our ultrasound, we learned that our baby did not, in fact, have Spina Bifida or any other mutation of the spine. Relived, elated and blessed were the feelings we were experiencing during the next 90 minutes of watching our baby roll, swim and perform a Bela Karolyi type of gymnastics.
We have decided that it's not the fear of the unknown, it's the fear of something going wrong that is the scariest part of pregnancy. This is our first child and we don't know what to expect. No book, doctor or advice can prepare us for what will happen during pregnancy. We know that we will continue to feel all the emotions of pregnancy, even the scary ones, until our little one is here. We just want to enjoy it with a little less fear and a lot more of ignorant bliss.
Sunday, November 17, 2013
We're Expecting!
I cannot believe I am already at the end of my 15th week of my pregnancy. Where has the last four months gone? It has been a roller coaster of a ride for us so far (for myself, Eric and baby!).
Eric and I were "practicing" in the spring, so that when we went to Hawaii in the summer we would really be trying, except nothing happened. I should really remember that nothing, and I mean nothing, happens the way it's supposed to. I was ready to buy a "Made in Maui" onesie and pick out a nice Hawaiian name. After our honeymoon, I was becoming discouraged every month when all our hard work (giggle) produced a negative result. I went back to work in August and just got wrapped up in curriculum, IEP's and behavior plans that I totally forgot I should have gotten my period Labor Day weekend. The following weekend I had an event for the Brides Against Breast Cancer organization. I was again busy selling wraps, but thought it was odd that I still didn't get my period. We took an at home test Saturday afternoon and it came back positive! I was shocked, thrilled, scared and every other emotion rolled up into one. Eric was waiting in the hallway and the minute I saw him I just burst into tears. He was excited, but not convinced. "Maybe you should take another one in a few days and make sure it is in the morning, like you're supposed to," negative Nancy told me. So on Tuesday morning, I took the test before I went to work and I left it on the counter next to his phone and wallet, just so he could see it was positive for the second time.
The next two weeks were torture, while waiting to see the doctor to indeed confirm that with all the scientific knowledge of another pregnancy test that I was, in fact, pregnant. Our new OBGYN, Dr. S. confirmed that I was only seven weeks along and that all we could do was talk- no heartbeat, no ultrasound, no exam, no nothing. This is my first time at the pregnancy stuff, so I was very confused and disappointed. So we talked. And talked. For an hour! What doctor wants to spend an hour with you to talk Packer football and Tiger's baseball and celebrity encounters? Dr. S! As a Wisconsin native, she has already won the heart of my husband (I have yet to meet anyone from Wisconsin that I didn't like) and since she is a doctor that listens and spends more than enough time with her patients, she has won me over, too. The next eight weeks are a whole different journey- for another post...
Eric and I were "practicing" in the spring, so that when we went to Hawaii in the summer we would really be trying, except nothing happened. I should really remember that nothing, and I mean nothing, happens the way it's supposed to. I was ready to buy a "Made in Maui" onesie and pick out a nice Hawaiian name. After our honeymoon, I was becoming discouraged every month when all our hard work (giggle) produced a negative result. I went back to work in August and just got wrapped up in curriculum, IEP's and behavior plans that I totally forgot I should have gotten my period Labor Day weekend. The following weekend I had an event for the Brides Against Breast Cancer organization. I was again busy selling wraps, but thought it was odd that I still didn't get my period. We took an at home test Saturday afternoon and it came back positive! I was shocked, thrilled, scared and every other emotion rolled up into one. Eric was waiting in the hallway and the minute I saw him I just burst into tears. He was excited, but not convinced. "Maybe you should take another one in a few days and make sure it is in the morning, like you're supposed to," negative Nancy told me. So on Tuesday morning, I took the test before I went to work and I left it on the counter next to his phone and wallet, just so he could see it was positive for the second time.
The next two weeks were torture, while waiting to see the doctor to indeed confirm that with all the scientific knowledge of another pregnancy test that I was, in fact, pregnant. Our new OBGYN, Dr. S. confirmed that I was only seven weeks along and that all we could do was talk- no heartbeat, no ultrasound, no exam, no nothing. This is my first time at the pregnancy stuff, so I was very confused and disappointed. So we talked. And talked. For an hour! What doctor wants to spend an hour with you to talk Packer football and Tiger's baseball and celebrity encounters? Dr. S! As a Wisconsin native, she has already won the heart of my husband (I have yet to meet anyone from Wisconsin that I didn't like) and since she is a doctor that listens and spends more than enough time with her patients, she has won me over, too. The next eight weeks are a whole different journey- for another post...
Monday, July 29, 2013
New Blog!
What happens when you get married and create a new email address and you only use that email address and forget all of your previous email addresses and then you go to blog with your old email address, but you forget the password and Google says, "ACCESS DENIED"? Well, you start over with a new blog. So here it is- add it now and read it later. If anyone knows my old password, please feel free to tell me what it is!
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